Murphy's Laws

Las Vegas Law
Never bet on a loser because you think his luck is bound to change.

Barth's Distinction
There are two types of people: those who divide people into two types,
and those who don't.

Schopenhaur's Law of Entropy
If you put a spoonful of wine in a barrel full of sewage, you get
sewage.  If you put a spoonful of sewage in a barrel full of wine,
you get sewage.

April 23, Weiberg's Second Law
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs,
then the first woodpecker would have destroyed civilization.

March 7, Horner's Five-Thumb Postulate
Experience varies directly with the amount of equipment ruined.

May 7, Lovka's Other Advice
Never rely on a person who uses "party" as a verb.

March 8, Willoughby's Law
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

February 14, Jana's Second Law of Love
Better a pebble given out of love than a diamond out of duty.

August 30, Felson's Law
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from
many is research.

March 21, Jones' Law
The man who can smile when something goes wrong has thoughts
of someone he can blame it on.

February 24, Aigner's Axiom
No matter how well you perform your job, a superior will seek
to modify the results.

September 7, J.S. Gillete's Dictum
The only labor worth laboring at is a labor of love.

September 5, Jana's Definition
If you want it but you don't, and you can't understand it
but you do, it must be love.

August 20, Arthur's First Law of Love
People to whom you are attracted invariably think you remind
them of someone else.

September 13, Second Law for Free-lance Artists
All rush jobs are due the same day